It’s been about 6 weeks since my last post, and I wish I could tell you that I had a good reason for why that is. In all honesty, my hosting fee was due on January 1st and, when my credit card was declined (the one on file with my hosting company expired long ago), I felt a bit relieved. I toyed with the idea of quitting because, clearly, blogging hasn’t been a huge priority lately. I’m hoping to change that, though. Throughout the whole drama of not having hosting, I was on the fence about what to do. It turns out, I have friends in high places who can host this space for free. My decision was made for me. The blog stays. How much I’ll update it? That will vary, I’m sure. Once a week sounds pretty reasonable.
So much has happened since we last spoke. I mean, it’s already a NEW YEAR.
I spent all of January preparing myself to complete a February Vegetarian Whole 30. To do this, I immediately started eating eggs/avocado for breakfast instead of the sugary cereal I’m used to. I also reduced dairy and carbs (slightly, haha) as well as reduced my sugar consumption. I read articles, recipes, and kept the official Vegetarian Whole 30 shopping list open in my Safari browser. The most helpful blog posts were from Healthy Tipping Point, as Caitlin completed the Vegetarian Whole 30 in 2015.
My official start date for the Vegetarian Whole 30 was last Sunday, January 29th, because February only has 28 days. I realized later that I miscalculated and could’ve started on January 30th. Oops. This is why I studied the social sciences and not math 😛
Diets like this are NOT my style. I do pretty well maintaining a healthy weight through intuitive eating and regular exercising. My coworker was going to do the Whole 30 and we decided to do it together. Honestly, my eating habits are not the healthiest. I used to rely on Taco Bell for dinner about 1 night/week (I put an end to that mid-December). I eat a vegetarian diet, but eat very few veggies. I figured Whole 30 would reset my taste buds and get me cooking more.
You know how they say “be careful what you wish for ’cause you just might get it?” Well, I got food poisoning or the stomach flu or SOMETHING on the third day of my Whole 30 adventure… and now I can’t even *think* about eating an egg, roasted vegetable, or black bean… EVER AGAIN. Perhaps I’m being dramatic, but my taste buds have definitely changed in the last 3 days.
Long story short, I think it’s time for me to get on a different meal planning train. Whole 30 is NOT sustainable. So, why can’t I find balance in my real life? This is my new challenge. I do make some unhealthy choices and that is completely acceptable as long as I can balance them out with healthy choices.
The truth is, I feel like I’ve lost myself throughout this wedding planning. I go to the gym less, feel extremely stressed over really silly things (our current dilemma is agreeing on PLATES for the registry. I can’t even believe myself; I used to make fun of people with these “problems.”), and realize now that I’ve completed 3 days of a Whole 30 (haha) that I am a TOTAL emotional eater. Not having the option to turn to ice cream when something went wrong during those 3 days really was a challenge. I don’t think I was always like this, but perhaps I was less stressed out before grad school/adulting/wedding planning came on full-force?
I’m a therapist, so I know that it’s helpful to go towards the good in difficult times. I *know* what has worked for me in the past: balanced diet, regular running schedule/goals, and not putting so much pressure on myself. The Whole 30 was pressure. Nothing about it was enjoyable to me in those 3 days, so why was I doing it? I’m wondering if that puke fest on Day 3 was a sign that extreme lifestyle changes like that are NOT FOR ME.
To get “back to me,” my new plan is to finally register for the Shamrock Shuffle (YEAR 11 IN A ROW FOR ME!), formulate a training plan, work on a healthier eating plan that isn’t FULL of restrictions and is more about ~balance~, and to continue enjoying the process of wedding planning. Since we last spoke, I reached my peak of getting upset with people for judging me and now I feel better about it. Haters gonna hate. I’m planning MY dream wedding and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. Only 6 months and 3 days until WE GET MARRIED!
The moral of this story? Restrictive diets are not for everyone, running is always the answer, make friends who know a lot about the internet (or learn about the internet yourself, if that’s your jam), and plan your dream wedding. PERIOD.